Newsgroups: rec.arts.comics.misc,rec.arts.comics.xbooks
From: [t--g] at [HQ.Ileaf.COM] (Tom Galloway)
Subject: Re: PAD. Is it really him?
Date: Thu, 15 Oct 92 15:17:56 GMT

[d j daneh] at [PacBell.COM] (Dan'l DanehyOakes) writes:
> Oh, great.  *NOW* you've gone and done it.  Next thing you know
> Moriarty will be up on the table doing his Roddy McDowell impression
> and singing "The Seven Deadly Virtues."  Really, some people have no
> sense of self-restraint at all. . .

Yes, but we must pander to, er, entertain our audience which doesn't do
Broadway but rather rock'n'roll...

(fade in; "I want my Image books...I want my Image books...I want my Image
books...") 

(bamf noises replicating the drum beats, a Banshee scream replaces the whine of
the electric guitar)

Now look at them X-books that's the way you do it
You draw the muties for the big fat fees
That ain't drawin' that's the way they do it
Muties for nothin' and checks for free
Now that ain't drawin' that's the way they do it
Lemme tell ya them guys ain't dumb
Maybe get a blister on your drawin' finger
Maybe make a ninja of your chum

We gotta install some new wall units
Thirteen spinoff mini-series
We gotta move these Youngblood Ones
We gotta move these Image muties

See the little wartist with the cliches and the angstin'
Yeah buddy them's his own plots
That little wartist got his own jet Lockheed
That little wartist he's a real hot shot

We gotta install some new wall units
Fifteen spinoff mini-series
We gotta move these Youngblood Ones
We gotta move these Image muties

(snickt, zap, thunder, bamf, cash register noises)

I shoulda learned to write them muties
I shoulda learned to draw those guys
Look at that mutie, she got it stickin' in the jugular
Don't they ever have no fun?
And he's up there, what's that? Snickting noises?
Slicin' up those ninjas like a Cuisinart
That ain't writin' that's the way you do it
Draw your muties for nothin' get your checks for free

We gotta install some new wall units
Nineteen spinoff mini-series
We gotta move these Youngblood Ones
We gotta move these Image muties

(sound of dragon howling in background, followed by sound of cash register
 drawer opening)

Now that ain't writin' that's the way they do it
You draw your muties for the big fat fees
That ain't writin' that's the way they do it
Muties for nothin' and your checks for free
Muties for nothin' and checks for free

Muties for nothin', checks for free
I want my, I want my, I want my, Image books
(intertwined and repeated to fade, with cash register sounds in background)

Parody lyrics copyright 1985, 1988, 1992 Thomas Young Galloway (originally
I want my X-Muties, updated for the times)

"Recccccccccc.arts.comics where the flames go scrolling down the screen..."
  --RAClahoma, the musical
tyg   [t--g] at [hq.ileaf.com]