The Gardener’s Song

This is the gardener’s song from Carroll’s Silvie and Bruno. In the story, it is spread throughout the entire text.

• • He thought he saw an Elephant,
  • That practised on a fife:
  • He looked again, and found it was
  • A letter from his wife.
  • “At length I realise”, he said,
  • “The bitterness of Life!”
• • He thought he saw a Buffalo
  • Upon the chimney-piece:
  • He looked again, and found it was
  • His Sister’s Husband’s Niece.
  • “Unless you leave this house”, he said,
  • “I’ll send for the Police!”
• • He thought he saw a Rattlesnake
  • That questioned him in Greek:
  • He looked again, and found it was
  • The Middle of Next Week.
  • “The one thing I regret”, he said,
  • “Is that it cannot speak!”
• • He thought he saw a Banker’s Clerk
  • Descending from the bus:
  • He looked again, and found it was
  • A Hippopotamus:
  • “If this should stay to dine”, he said,
  • “There wo’n’t be much for us!”
• • He thought he saw a Kangaroo
  • That worked a coffee-mill:
  • He looked again, and found it was
  • A Vegetable-Pill.
  • “Were I to swallow this”, he said,
  • “I should be very ill!”
• • He thought he saw a Coach-and-Four
  • That stood beside his bed:
  • He looked again, and found it was
  • A Bear without a Head.
  • “Poor thing,” he said, “poor silly thing!
  • It’s waiting to be fed!”
• • He thought he saw an Albatross
  • That fluttered round the lamp:
  • He looked again, and found it was
  • A Penny-Postage-Stamp.
  • “You’d best be getting home,” he said:
  • “The nights are very damp!”
• • He thought he saw a Garden-Door
  • That opened with a key:
  • He looked again, and found it was
  • A Double Rule of Three:
  • “And all its mystery”, he said,
  • “Is clear as day to me!”
• • He thought he saw an Argument
  • That proved he was the Pope:
  • He looked again, and found it was
  • A Bar of Mottled Soap.
  • “A fact so dread”, he faintly said,
  • “Extinguishes all hope!”